prelude to a postlude

[image: cobaltika]
[currently listening to: the cinematic orchestra - the awakening of a woman]

I feel a need to be grounded.

you are vindicated, is it validating?

[image slitrin]
[currently listening to: bonobo - sleepy seven]

we held your head as your body fell back
into the mouth of the giant.
we cradled the seams from the linen that came undone
wrapped you close in our arms.
child, you are safe
you are not alone.

Soredemo Boku-wa Yattenai

"I still didn't do it"


3 screening dates at the Empire Granville Theatre for the Vancouver International Film Festival.
- Saturday Sept 29th (2:00 pm)
- Friday Oct 5th (9:15 pm)
- Saturday Oct 6th (2:30 pm)

This movie is really a morbid reflection of Japan's defunct legal system. A girl falsely accuses an innocent man for groping her in a crowded train. "In Japan judges are promoted for the speed with which they deal with their caseloads with a resulting 99.9% guilty rate. Belying its adoption of most aspects of modern democracy, Japan does not have trial by jury and presumption of guilt is reality in all but name." The result? Either:
1) Confess to a crime you didn't commit, pay an insane shitload of money and walk away with a criminal record
2) Be subjected to months to years of psychological and physical torture in an attempt to argue with a legal system that presumes your guilt rather than innocence anyway.

In either situation, you're cooped up in a small ass box tied to real criminals - murders, petty thieves, rapists, yakuza, etc. Legal counsel is not allowed for the first few days and even afterwards, it's limited and useless. Police will subject you to an onslaught of verbal coercion day in and day out in order to pry forth a false confession. In short, a person could make a living just simply accusing people of crimes they didn't commit and walk away with a fat wallet. It's that very injustice that makes one wonder... how many people locked up in japanese jails are really innocent? Whether you're a Japanese native or a foreigner visiting the country... just take note.

I urge anyone who has any interest in Japan to give this movie a try. I haven't seen it yet since I don't understand a damn word but subtitles are provided at the screenings. The October showings will feature an appearance of the film director, Masayuki Suo ("Shall We Dance"). If all works out, Simon might appear up on stage with him at the October screenings.

four-skin

lol, I remember watching re-runs of this show eons ago... this must be an outtake

requiem

[image: Игорь Гаврилов]
[currently listening to: jocelyn pook - oppenheimer]

"We knew the world would not be the same. A few people laughed, a few people cried, most people were silent. I remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita. Vishnu is trying to persuade the Prince that he should do his duty and to impress him takes on his multi-armed form and says, "Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds." I suppose we all thought that, one way or another." --Robert Oppenheimer

into the space of everything

[image: strokethyfrost]
[currently listening to: boards of canada - in a beautiful place out in the country]

dear angelo,

did i ever tell you about my grandmama - my po-po.? when i look at her eyes, they're always lost under layers of papery skin. a sitting temple in her chair, i sometimes wonder how she could see out of them. my aunties and uncles all call her 'fei ma', which literally translates to fat mother.

when i was 12, she used to take me out on walks along main street through the punjab markets to buy curry pastries on weekends. she had a small vegetable garden at the back of her house where she grew tomatoes, zucchinis, peas, lettuce and other vegetables i cannot recall. i remember the huge plum tree that towered over the house - i used to hang from its enormous branches on idle summer days and clamoured through her mossy yard in search of unknown insects. po-po's house always smelled of cantonese soup and incense. fresh fish was always mandatory during dinners. her favourite part was eating the head and picking apart the meat from the fish bones. all the children would always looked disgusted as po-po sucked on the goopy eyeballs and spat out a white pearl afterwards. with a chuckle, she'd giggle and always say that it's good for the brain. it was my grandma who taught me how to eat the cheeks and lips of the fish, which was the tenderest and best part of the whole fish.

my aunties and uncles always made fun of my grandma's terrible chinese writing. in reality, she only had 3 years of formal schooling... the rest, she learned on her own. this is why she's always reading the newspaper. perhaps most intriguing to the family was po-po's ability to calculate in her head - she could accurately multiply taxes and numbers faster than punching them into a calculator. despite having 10 children, my grandma was a businesswoman. she knew how to bargain, run businesses and invest.

when po-po was 12, she had 2 brothers and a sister. in december, the alarm sirens rang in hong kong. po-po's youngest brother was running a high fever but my po-po's mom insisted he attend school. bombs fell, one of them had hit the school. no one could find po-po's little brother, just arms and legs from all the students strewn throughout the rubble. there was no point in crying. weeks continued on as bombs continued to pummel the city. starvation was everywhere as people tried to flee. the ija army had arrived by foot, bringing death. po-po could never forget the sound of the clopping pig-skin boots and the screams of neighbourhood girls irregardless of age being raped in front of family members before being tortured and killed. po-po had to rub charcoal all over her face and hair to appear like an old woman in fear of being the next victim. there was hunger, a biting starvation burned through the stomachs of thousands of civilians that would last for years. as the eldest, po-po and her family had to survive so she turned to the sea. in the early morning, po-po and her mother would go out to the shores. the bombs from the sea had killed fish and they washed up ashore amongst bloated dead bodies. on the outskirts of the city near the mountains, po-po and her family had managed to cultivate a small vegetable garden of bak-choy and lo-bak (daikon). food could be traded for rice and other goods. one day, po-po was caught. the fate of others caught if they didn't kow-tow (bow) in front of the ija soldiers was immediate beheading, bayoneting or torturing. she remembers how some men were dragged to their deaths as they were tied to a horse from the top of a large hillside. when po-po was caught, she was beaten, especially to her hands which remained swollen for months. she was alive. po-po's other little brother had picked up some bits and pieces of broken japanese from listening to the ija soldiers. they were fortunate enough to have met a forgiving group of soldiers who were amused by the brother's attempt at the language and agreed to trade lo-bak for some rice. this was how po-po and her family survived in the end. the entire city of hong kong was reduced from 1.6 million to 600,000 people during the 4 year ordeal. no apologies from the government was ever formally addressed by the japanese government over the millions of lives taken in china, russia, korea, philippines and so on.

today, po-po never talks about that part of her past. she is still the gleefully happy old woman with wrinkly papery eyelids who talks excitedly like a child. in the end, my grandma will always be my po-po.

the warm sound of silent rain and train tracks

[image: jane; circa 2004 art journal]
[currently listening to: nick drake - pink moon]

dear angelo,
i've been thinking about you again. when is the next i can see you? i want to consummate the stillness of the moment and just drift away into the good night.
--jane

the innocent perpetrator

[image: mehmeturgut]

i lied about vonnegut

[image: В Плену у Яблок]

where will i be relative to ------------> [stop].
my geography is terrible.
the world map on my wall stares back at me,
highlighting the places you'll go but i never will see
i can't swim or fly or walk fast enough
eating up those kilometres, hours and moments
towards your destination[s].
my finger is pointing on the black dot,
bold letters and fine print -
you will be here and here and here.
i won't know where you'll be
not here, not with me
staring at the map.

baaaack

[images: jane; circa august 20007, banff roadtrip]

The roadtrip to Banff was gorgeous. Although the actual car ride was extremely trying on patience, it all fell through. I've never gone past Hope to see the Canadian Rockies and my goodness, it's wonderful. The glacial lakes in the area like Lake Louise are beautiful as the waters are this emerald blue. What I didn't expect was the temperature to drop just below 0 C at night... Mark was sooooo unprepared. He pretty much came in shorts and flip flops with a blanket as a sleeping bag. His comments on general geography and knowledge about anything were to say the least... astoundingly unintelligible. He is really his own category of his own. If it weren't for his car, Simon and I would have never had him come along. I will seriously shoot someone in the face if I hear another "your mother is so fat" joke. But anyways, the weather warmed up during the day and since we were so high up in altitude, the weather would change so quickly. Given the inhumane quantities of meat and eggs in our diet throughout the week, all we could do was fart and sit on the latrine with great constipation with little luck in fancy hotels. Since river rafting was out of the question for one of the days due to time constraints, we all decided to go to Calgary for a day. Sooooo much dang flatness. The flies were numerous and the Calgary district was very business-like. Albertans are the craziest aggressive drivers and their meat and gas are not cheap. Downtown Calgary is really well planned out for its weather conditions... skywalks connect all the main buildings. The 4th floor of the Bay building features a huge indoor garden which I guess would be pleasant during the freezing cold winters. Overall, I think Calgary city would be more enjoyable during the winter when hockey season is in full bloom, otherwise the city would just be another business-y vancouver-like city. After 3 nights in Banff, we spent a single night in Kelowna and had 2 FULL dinners... the pinnacle of gluttony I know. Given what we ate, it didn't help with alleviating constipation. The Okanagan valley is actually really pleasant with its comfortable summer temperatures of 30 C at night. By the next morning, we all bought a bunch of fresh fruit and headed for home... but first, a stop at the Home Restaurant at Hope for a Mountain Man Breakfast (which I recommend). Gas is the cheapest in Hope by far of all the places at 99.9 per Litre. On the way home via the transcanada hwy. a chicken truck of all things flipped over.... this literally caused a 5 hour halt of all traffic. You can imagine the nutso-ness of terrified chickens, motorists and emergency crew at the scene. Of course, Mark just went beserk behind the wheel... he was so damn impatient. He deserves a bazillion more traffic tickets for his insane driving skills. We didn't get home any sooner with his driving or his complaining. Oi :S. Anyways, that pretty much sums up the trip.